News Anchor Boned Up on 'E. coli' for Nothing
by Marge Schultz Morning Star Gazette
August 7, 2014
"I was just like, 'fuck me,'" Scranton ABS 'Channel 6 at Six News' anchor Cynthia Sneed said after three Long Island Iced Teas.
"I said, 'well, they're both viruses' and she was like, 'no, one's a pathogenic bacteria.' Bitch."
Her guest, Dr. Gail Bolan, a CDC spokesperson, seemed hellbent on highlighting and correcting each and everyone of her mistakes.
"The difference is food poisoning versus a a virus that can kill you in three days," said Dr. Bolan.
She later revealed she knew what she was doing.
"Yeah, it was intentional," said Bolan.
"I hate all these little size-0 anchorwomen who can read up on Justin Beiber but not bird flu or mad cow disease. Screw 'em."
Sneed said she had to change tactics to survive the last minute.
"I just asked the condescending bitch open-ended questions about ebola that couldn't possibly be turned back on me," said a drunken Sneed.
Sneed's producers have given her the rest of the week off without pay.
"Fuck 'em all."
watch Sneed's epic meltdown
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